Runner’s are weird…well, most of us. We act in ways that regular people don’t understand, yet it’s typical behavior in the running community. We speak our own language, and we use words like “easy” and “five miles” in the same sentence to the dismay of our non-runner friends.
We have seemingly strange motivations; a t-shirt and a medal get us out of bed early on a Sunday morning; Not to mention our unique sleep, eating, and (clears throat) bathroom habits.
If running is in your blood or if you’ve ever felt the pull to the pavement, I’m sure you can relate to a few of these.
You Might Be a Runner If… you save this to your favorite Pinterest board to laugh at later.
In my best Jeff Foxworthy voice, I introduce…
YOU MIGHT BE A RUNNER IF…
You wake up earlier on the weekends than during the week
You have no problem spending $50 ro run a 5K, but spend frugally on non-running activities
You know what a negative split means and you do it regularly
You genuinely appreciate porta-potties
You wouldn’t dream of ending a run on an uneven number (unless it’s 3.1, 6.2, 13.1 or 26.2)
You own more running shoes than regular shoes
You laugh politely (and roll your eyes) when people make bad running jokes (Run? I only run when someone is chasing me! How many miles? I’m exhausted from driving that far.)
You know better than to wear cotton
You have a runner’s tan (sock lines, Garmin lines, shorts lines, racerback lines)
You’ve used the words “only” or “easy” when describing a 10K
Everyone on Instagram knows you run every day
At least one of your social handles or emails has the word runner in it
You pray for an overcast 45 degrees weather forecast
You vote yes on the “leggings are pants” debate
You plan your annual vacations around out-of-town races
You lost a toenail and wear your naked toe bed as a badge of honor
You pooped your pants on a run (or at least came close)!
Peeing in the bushes is not out of the realm of possibilities
You get jealous when you see a runner when you’re not running
You’ve experienced runner’s high
You know exactly the one mile marker in every direction from your house
You feel bad for the technician when you get a pedicure
You’re a proud member of the sport bra squad
You happily spend full price on running clothes, but buy your work clothes from the clearance rack.
You know that your stomach is a endless, bottomless pit the day after your long run
You dress up your running tights and wear them to work (and hope no one notices)
Running is your therapy
You think running hills is fun
You have a Pinterest board dedicated to running
You pay attention of the color of your pee
You see a runner in your neighborhood you wonder why you’re not already friends
You don’t laugh when you hear the word Fartlek (anymore)
You live in the US and totally understand the metric system
You have at least one running sticker on your car
Your friend asks you to meet for lunch and you ask if you can wear your running tights
You bring toilet paper with you on a long run, just in case
You’ve tried to talk your non-runner friend into running “just” a 5K
You’ve made a wrong turn and gotten lost on a run
People ask you what you’re doing this weekend, and the answer is always running
Your laundry is more than 50% running clothes
Dry shampoo and the phrase “run hair, don’t care” are a way of life
You skip the parties and go to bed at 9 PM on Saturday night
You’ve tried to think of a good comeback from when someone yells at you “Run Forrest Run”
There are more ice packs in your freezer than ice cubes
The local running store is where “Everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came.”
The sign on the highway says five miles to exit and you think, I could run that
You have at least one drawer overflowing with race shirts
You have lucky socks
You named your dog Meb
You’re stuck in traffic and you realize you could run home faster
You have to use special anti-stink laundry detergent
You don’t wash your hair after your run so you have time to run three more miles
You accept chafing as a fact of life
You get mad when someone calls you a jogger
You get mad when the news station calls someone else a jogger
You’ve binged watched your favorite Netflix show on a treadmill
You’ve gotten up at 2am to run a race
You’ve prepared a pre-race poop strategy
You’ve taken an ice bath
Your BRF (best running friend) knows more about your bodily functions than your significant other
You paint your other toenails black to match the black one from running
You own more compression socks than dress socks
You speak in acronyms; PR, BQ, DNF, LSD, HR, VO2
Your dog is the fittest pup in the neighborhood
Your holiday celebrations includes 5Ks
You run because it’s socially unacceptable to punch people in the face
You like to read funny blog posts about running
Did I miss any? Do you have anything to add to the list? I’d love to hear your suggestions!
Did you like this post? Do you know someone who might laugh or “get it”? It helps me when you share with your friends and followers.
There are unwritten rules of the big box gym sauna, that I felt the need to write because so many people that I encounter on my regular visits to the sauna seem unaware of sauna etiquette. Heat exposure can have great health benefits, make the most of your experience, and those around you, by following these basic sauna principles.